Submission is finding my primal strength. The place that gives me energy, makes me live. But not by being there for myself. But precisely by being there for the Other, the Others. To lead my life as She wishes. So first forget my current self. Then slowly build up to the perfect subject who does everything in the sign of his superior(s).

 

Everything without thinking, just following and obeying. Something that cannot be achieved just like that, but, based on safety and respect, through the right combination of rules, assignments, punishment and humiliation. Being there for the Mrs/Mr as a waiter, butler, slave, slut and

whatever else is desired. Becoming totally addicted to having total. Never again without being able or unwilling to, explore and push boundaries, no matter where and when She wishes (wishes). Totally shaped as a slave slut and servant.

 

A few years ago I found that "primal feeling" with a Mistress. When I came in contact with Her, after a few sessions, everything fell into place, it felt like I was "coming home" I got peace and energy at the same time.

 

She is a strict, hard, honest, respectful and also social Mistress who has taken me by the hand and from the moment I let Her fully trusted her explore and push my boundaries. In which I surrender completely to Her, within my hard limits, without asking questions, only by obeying.

 

Hereby I grew slowly but steadily from just whips and bondage to being (almost) completely total slaves. Think of: pain, humiliation, pee, sounding, electro, exhibitionism and bi-acts. I feel wonderful about this, "weird but true".

 

However, this surrender takes place alongside my "normal" life; it is and remains, at least for me, difficult to talk about this with others (friends, family), and even harder to integrate these 2 worlds. Partly for that reason a site like Sexpower is for me top !, I can tell my story there, I get a listening and understanding ear, and there I get meaningful feedback.

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