How do we keep our children out of the clutches of loverboys?
The word "lover boy" quickly paints people a picture of a dangerous looking young man (preferably of foreign descent).
According to Wikipedia, a lover boy or teenage pimp is a pimp who seizes girls through seduction tactics to eventually exploit them in prostitution or in illegal activities. Traffickers and pimps all over the world often use romantic manipulation to bring or keep women and girls into prostitution.
However, this is a very limited picture. In any case, it is not only the girls who fall into the hands of these people. Many boys from a strongly religious environment, who tried out a little more than their culture prescribes, are also very blackmailable. Moroccan boys, for example, are a growing group of victims. It starts with temptation and often ends in blackmail. So there are many forms in our own Dutch society that are not always easy to recognize. Where you look for your daughter's shifty boyfriend, it is perhaps her best girlfriend who shows her every day how great she is and can buy everything through her "hobby". First she helps your daughter out a few times and it is only logical that that the favour is returned atsome point.
So if you can't recognize it, how are you going to prevent it? Not by banning all kinds of things or arousing fears in any case.
You can earn money from people who don't know their limits. There will always be people who abuse this. Build the foundation of your child: self-confidence, self-acceptance, being who they are, open communication and the feeling of being understood. What a lover boy / girl starts to do quite quickly is isolating the victim. He emphasizes everything that is wrong in people around him / her. The lover boy / girl is really the only one who really sees and understands you. The rest of the world is gradually becoming a less good. Fear is easy to strengthen. Fear always shows evidence that is not there. A lover boy / girl easily uses this.
The lover boy or girl builds up a relationship of trust in the field of love or friendship. Someone with low self-esteem will be more sensitive to this. Teach your child that it has freedom of choice. Teach it to feel where his or her limits lie. Do not do this by setting these limits for hot child. Teach children what they are worth. A child who feels that it does not matter is much more sensitive to someone who does seem to give attention and love. Then the child is also more willing to cross their own boundaries in order not to lose that love. You cannot protect children from everything in the world. You can help them build their self-esteem so that they see and feel when their limits are reached. If they are so afraid of losing their boyfriend, because they will be alone again, they are more willing to do more than they actually want. Maybe at that moment he / she cannot even really feel that a boundary has been crossed.
Daisy Jacobs
sexpower.online
Datum: 03-07-'19
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